I wish I could stoop to your depths, instead I love you too much to put myself first. I hear and see all the lies and evidence you mistakenly leave behind. I ignore , not out of desperation, or complications, but out of unconditional love. For I know that even if I find what I’m looking for it won’t matter, my heart will still beat for you and you alone.
I feel twisted knowing this , it’s like a curse . I thought I was special, possessing the power to be able to love a person so much that nothing they do wrong will break it. I thought it was a blessing , a miracle , a chance at true love. But all things come with a cost , I didn’t think you’d be it.
Sitting here in front of me tormenting me , knowing that I won’t hurt you. Thinking I’m weak and desperate. If only you knew . I do love you but love does not mean that I have to be with you to love you . I can love you from a different state, and existence. I will not continue this route , I have long enough ,being driven by my loud conscious telling me to listen to my heart.
I cannot believe it , somehow the voice is starting to fade. Does this mean I am becoming weak ? Well if it is , so what ? Just look at where being patient and resilient has gotten me. There’s a whisper “Karma is real”. Once again this curse leads me head first to be the bigger person and forgive with out punishment. Let The Angeles be with me in my journeys to protect me from my own undoing.